When I get myself into a mess, I really do a good job of it. My best friend's dad has a saying: "It'll all be okay in the end. If it's not okay, it's not the end." I like that. But I'm looking at no end in sight right now. As of this point, it looks like 2009 is going to be an even worse year than the last two, and that's saying a lot. In 2007 I had an emotional breakdown, became super-depressed, starting seeing a shitty psychiatrist, lost my job, started seeing a shitty sexual abuse counselor, went farther into debt (I had been making good money). In 2008 I left and cheated on my husband, still unemployed, ended up pregnant and getting married when I had no plans for either, more into debt, behind on my debt, moving in with my parents while my husband deployed during my entire pregnancy. The only highlight of 2009 has been the birth of my son, and of course his complete existence. That's a lot, but there's still a lot of shit at the end of the day. At least everything that's going on right now will undoubtedly be over by the end of the year, and maybe I can actually finally realistically look forward to a grand 2010.
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